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Even Jay-Z Has Bad Verses

Even Jay-Z Has Bad Verses

🏪 Calling all American apes—We gotta step it up. December’s Retail Sales report was decent, but I’d expect better from the GOATs of spending money.

Ankit Sinha
Ankit Sinha
CPI Report - “C” Is For “Confusing”

CPI Report - “C” Is For “Confusing”

💸 Inflation came in both higher and lower than expected. And everyone loved it. Find out why this particularly confusing CPI print sent markets soaring.

So...How Green Is It?

So...How Green Is It?

🇬🇱 Trip to Nuuk, anyone? The U.S. buying Greenland is the geopolitical equivalent of your uncle saying, ‘This time, I’ll win the lottery.’ Could this be the jackpot?

Lacking Sense & Making Cents

Lacking Sense & Making Cents

🛫 Americans finished 2024 with an all-time performance of our national pastime, spending money. Find out why 2025 is already looking like a banner year below.

All-Time Athletic Performance

All-Time Athletic Performance

💼 Everyone in the U.S. had a 4.0 GPA and crushed their networking calls last month. Hiring went stupid as job additions came in >65% higher than expected.

Nvidia CEO Kills Quantum’s Dream

Nvidia CEO Kills Quantum’s Dream

🌐 RIP to President Carter. And thanks for the day off. Anyway, on Wednesday, eBay shares ripped on a new partnership with Meta and Roku, which reminded Wall Street that it exists. Quantum stocks realized they have to make money and investors are selling anything close to the LA wildfires.

How Degens Are Trading 2025

How Degens Are Trading 2025

💸 Thanks, apes. All that shareholder value you create day in and day out is paying off. The Services sector (like Financial Services) is carrying the team.

Post-Holiday Spending Check

Post-Holiday Spending Check

🧱 As I scream into the void that is my wallet after the Holidays, I can’t help but wonder how the rest of America is doing. Find out below how the American consumer held up.

U.S. Manufacturing Holds Steady

U.S. Manufacturing Holds Steady

🏭 The most boring week of the year is finally over. Find out how U.S. manufacturing held up in December and what to expect this week as we get back to reality.

Tesla’s Sad Start to 2025

Tesla’s Sad Start to 2025

😢 When you’re kissing the President and Tweeting memes all day, it’s easy to forget you have to sell cars. Find out how bad it was for Tesla in Q4.

Ankit Sinha
Ankit Sinha
The S&P 2024: An All-Time Year

The S&P 2024: An All-Time Year

📈 2024 was a helluva year for any investor with the rare skill of sitting down and shutting up. Find out how well doing nothing worked in 2024.

Ankit Sinha
Ankit Sinha
Meme of the Year

Meme of the Year

👑 This is it. The day of reckoning is here. Wall Street’s most iconic award of 2024 is revealed below—check out the Platinum Banana for Meme of the Year.

Ankit Sinha
Ankit Sinha
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